Today is your first birthday in heaven. I wonder what you’re doing there for your birthday. Did you sleep late? Do you sleep in heaven? You don’t really like sweets but I hope that you got something to eat that you love.
I missed looking through birthday cards at the store for you. You know, the ones that I’d spend an hour finding…..just to make you cry? Even when they didn’t, you played along and I’m grateful that you did that for me.
In my Facebook memories this week there was a post that popped up from you to me. You told me that I need to learn the word REST! I’m trying to do that. I’m trying to find that balance that I’ve never had. Why did you and Daddy give me genes that make me so damn accountable for my job?
Phil and I had a question about a ground beef recipe this week. Who are we supposed to call with you gone? Who will make my okra and tomatoes perfectly for me?
There are so many unanswered questions, mom. There was never enough time for all of them.
Colton thinks that I need to have Medicare, so that we can make sure I’m taken care of because you are gone. He is a thinker, that boy. We cleaned out the building but he refuses to get rid of the rocks that you gave him.
In January we are going to take the rest of your ashes to Georgia and scatter them with Granny and Poppa. I know that you want that. While we are there we will visit with Aunt Glenese. I know that you wanted so badly to make that one last trip, so we’ll do it for you. Glenda, Ramona, Bobby, Cyndi, Phil and me, hanging out in Dublin just like when we were kids. We may even go to Poplar Springs and see if we recognize the window that belongs to Great Granny and Grandpa.
I’m still here on earth doing all the things that you said we should. Being responsible, caring for everyone, working and loving those around us, everyday – even on days like today that suck, because it’s your birthday and you are gone.
Happy Birthday, mom. I love you.
Nana Reflections 